It has been a whirlwind. These junior years have gone by so quickly, and the end of a school era draws near. Decisions for next year are upon us, as the whisper of change surrounds us.
Where has the time gone?
I reminisce of our earlier days together – playgrounds, splash pads, bike rides, trail walks, indoor play time, drawing, lightsaber fights, bedtime stories, and lullabies. I was immersed in his gentle world of playtime, creativity, and imagining. I saw glimpses of the world through his eyes and it changed me. My child gifted me with a greater sense of appreciation for the beauty and wonder that surrounds us.
I am grateful for him.
I marvel at my son. He has grown into a quirky, interesting, and creative human being. He is wise beyond his years. He has a deep understanding of the world that surrounds him, yet he embraces his childhood innocence with ease and enthusiasm. It is that childhood innocence that captures me, and fools me into believing he is still my sweet young baby boy. But I know. I know that he is growing up. He is establishing his independence. He is coming into his own.
I have to let go.
I am struggling with the realization that I am not needed in the same way. My own role as a parent, specifically a mother, is evolving. It is difficult. I am navigating unfamiliar territory. Parenting is hard. Yes, I know this blanket statement encompasses a vast arena of ups, downs, successes, and setbacks, but it speaks the truth. Parenting is hard. Just when you think you have a handle on the age and stage of your child, he evolves. He grows. His perspectives shift, his emotions are complex, and his innocence is altered. His growth as a child alters your own as a parent. It is like a phoenix rising. You are left standing in the ashes of what was, witnessing the evolution of what is.
You must navigate your child’s metamorphosis as you adjust to your own.
I don’t think we are meant to be still – to never evolve as a person – but navigating your child’s metamorphosis as you are navigating your own is very challenging. I sometimes wonder what would happen if we could just pause. If only for a moment. Pausing would allow us a chance to process the changes and adapt. It would allow us that opportunity to feel comfortable in this new skin. But, as mentioned, life is not meant to be still. And so, we stumble through the days making the best of our moments, trusting that we are guiding our child down a safe passage of self-discovery and independence, as we blindly follow our own.
My child is not mine to keep, but to teach how to soar on his own. I have to let go. To ensure success for my child in the middle school years, I must evolve as a parent. I cannot keep my baby bird tucked safely in the nest. I have to give him the freedom to fly. I must give him the wings of independence. And when he is ready, I know he will soar. And I know he will reach great heights.
The whisper of change is upon us now.
The Whisper of Change. Published by Crystal Joy Hall
Featured Image by Karolina Grabows
No Comments